• On the freeway, dude in the pick-up behind me talks on his cellphone, snarfs a sandwich, and tailgates like we’re attached until I leave the lane.
• Downtown, woman in high heels texts while j-strutting through frantic traffic.
• At the supermarket, suburban Momma barks at her bluetooth while ignoring her kids and budging to the front of the 10-item line (with 22 groceries in her cart).

Just another day, right?  Does anybody ever catch up, slow down and smell the fall colors any more?

5 ways to stop rushing

1. In the morning, upon waking up, stay in bed a while, and decide to do something (that isn’t on your to-do list) soothing that day.
2. Mid-morning, go outside for a walk, bike ride, or any other exercise bit.
3. At lunch, before you munch, give thanks, and remember the many that are hungry.
4. In the afternoon, when you’re feeling sleepy anyway, take a silence break—meditation, catnap, siesta; doesn’t really matter what you call it.
5. Before bed, unplug and play some mellow music, or just listen to some if you’re musically challenged.

As for me, the days that I don’t do some of those things (among other ‘habits’) are the days that feel lost—no matter how much I accomplished.

Seems modern-day survival relies on speedy multitasking.

But how much of that obsession actually amounts to anything?  How can we so value productivity yet admit we dislike our jobs, go deeper in debt, and suffer from crippling unemployment?  Wouldn’t it be great to recalibrate our collective priorities?

Maybe we’d use our time differently.  Maybe we’d take our time—literally—now and then.

Big-time BreakAways can wait.  But small-time breaks always await—and demand far less energy than they give back.

Ever wanted to ask a bunch of experts about how and why to BreakAway?  Well then, please join me and four fun, savvy smarties when we meet up for a few hours on October 18.  We’ll gather in Honey, a sweet club by Nye’s in Minneapolis, from 7-9, with doors and cheap sips starting at 6.

The event is called MeetPlanGo (this is Year 2) and it’s happening in 17 cities nationwide.  Wow!  Please meet your impressive panel…

• Julie DuRose: chef-turned-nomad who ate her way around the world for a year–half of it solo after a breakaway break-up–and lived to write about it;
• Layne Kennedy: acclaimed photographer who has shot everything from pink dolphins in the Amazon to Inuits in Greenland–for LIFE, National Geographic, Sports Illustrated and more;
• Kara McGuire: mother of three and author of an award-winning personal finance column in the StarTribune who knows a thing or two about saving money; and
• Leif Pettersen: a freelance writer, insatiable traveler, slightly caustic blogger and semi-professional wino who is a regular contributer to Lonely Planet.

And, of course, yours truly…

For details and registration, click here.  Hope to see you there!

Survey sez…

• 32% of parents play computer games with their children every day
• 80% described this as quality time

Source:  PopCap Games

Screen living continues to turn us on.  If 80% of parents say Guitar Hero kicks butt over Guitar Lessons, then bring on Milli Vanilli.  If two out of three play games daily with their children, then bye-bye badminton.

Hey, who can blame the ‘rents?  Our best diversions may have been Donkey Kong, Rockem’ Sockem’ Robots, or perhaps a bike.  As one dad snickered to me when I was barking about our kids’ digital jones,

C’mon.  You’re just jealous ‘cuz they have cooler stuff than you did.”

No doubt.  Still, there are still countless “cool” alternatives awaiting those open to off-screen quality time with their kids…

11  Quality Time Alternatives to Playing Computer Games with Your Children

1. Take guitar lessons and play that thing.
2. Bake a cake.  (Box will do.)
3. Go to outdoor sports event and get noisy.
4. Play cards, backgammon, checkers, or chess.
5. Light a bonfire, with plenty of flaming marshmallows.
6. Chase; young kids love it.
7. Read things out loud.
8. Play catch.
9. Dig out their old 3D toys.
10. Make hand-made cards for faraway friends.
11. Fish.

What’s your idea of quality time?  What would you add to the list?  I’m listening…

Downtowns are supposed to be places where we can walk, gawk and escape our routine.  Make some celebration.  Stumble on an odd adventure.  And feel the beat of the streets.  When traveling—whether to New York or to Tokyo—who doesn’t wander, eyes agog, to take it all in?

• Diversity ≠ danger

I took this picture in the spring of 1981.  After an all-night Greyhound ride from Chicago, I awoke in Minneapolis and took my first stroll down notorious Block E.  The Prudes That Be said it was squalid and scary—and thus eventually tore everything down to erect a mall that has failed.

To me, Block E buzzed with verve and authenticity; even the signage sings, if at times a raunchy tune.  So I hung out there now and then.  After attending Game 7 of the 1987 World Series, I ended up in Moby Dick’s and witnessed astonishing elation and conviviality.

• Now the Hard Rock crumbles…

23 years later, the soul-less, mammoth mall that replaced Moby’s and all the rest is now nearly empty.  Hard Rock will close by the end of the month.  Generic chain joints like Applebee’s, Hooters, GameWorks, and Panchero’s are already gone.

Perhaps the saddest twist of fate is this:  The new owners who bought the building have big plans of tearing this iteration down to erect a $200 million casino and hotel.

If this is progress, call me old-school.  Like dog poop that you step in and then spread it all over, the porn and strip joints they shut down have simply moved a few blocks to other locations; at least they used to be mostly on one block (which anyone could avoid and where cops and bouncers were abundant).

You could get “a whale of a drink” at Moby’s and get a dang-good-and-cheap “filet de boeuf” at 2 AM at Best Steak House.  If the new owners get their way, you can feed your gambling addiction and their pockets instead.

• Pictures preserve memories, if nothing else

Like all good career break and travel advocates, I’m also an unprofessional photographer.  Today’s news reminds me why.  There’s nothing fancy about this image.  Yet it becomes more precious as the years pass—both because it rouses inimitable memories, and because it preserves a vanished scene.

Do you have a list, written or not, of things you want to do before you…expire?  If so, that’s your bucket list, a term that everybody seems to detest, but gets more usage all the time anyway.  I’m here today to state that YES!  Why not?  Keep a dang bucket list, if only in your cranium.  There’s power in that thing.

And it seems like recently, the bucket list phenomenon has dumped on me many ways; here are a few…

• The rock show.

I’ve found myself at two concerts this summer because, in part, friends had decided that seeing U2 and The Jayhawks were on their bucket list.  So what if I’m not a big fan of either?  A great time was had by all and my buddies accomplished a life goal.

• “The bucket list lie.”

Soul brother blogger Jonathan Fields disses the list and insists that a “list of one” (just for today) is a better way to go.  He gets swamped with hundreds of weighty responses.

• “Bucket List,” the movie.

While on my last career break (spending 69 days in the West Indies with my family) we watched this fine movie.  Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman offer moving performances as terminally ill elders, and it served to remind me that I was lucky to be drinking from that blessed bucket at that very moment.

• All to say…

I hope your bucket list has not been thrown out with the trash.  After all, the only way you’ll GET what you want…is if you KNOW what you want.

That’s true whether it’s as simple as a $25 concert at 1^st Avenue, or as complicated as island-hopping for most of one winter in a place where the starfruit falls off the tree and the Calypso music echoes over the bay.

Speaking of career breaks, for sure the only folks who achieve one are the ones who keep the faith, no matter how irrational.  These things take time—sometimes decades—to actualize.  But belief beats the alternative:  Giving up.  While the story is still being written.

Even during dark days and droughts, the bucket can be half-full, right?

About a month ago, the New York Times offered a “Practical Traveler” article, “Planning the Perfect Vacation.” As a recovering perfectionist—and talented vacationer—I found the article to be both insightful and unfortunate.

• Are vacations a dying art?

So many people barely bother to vacation any more.  They’re too busy.  Can’t afford it.  Hate planning.  Or just let it slip away, like so many (dare I say) responsibilities.  Many who do manage to sneak away do so for just a few days; the trend remains for shorter breaks.  And “staycations” have gone mainstream.

That staycation may be a brilliant way to use the PTO days and unwind.  But really, who has mastered the challenge of staying home yet avoiding chores, routines, email/SM/TV/smart phone and all that?

Sometimes countless hours on a hammock with a view or a book might be what the Doctor of Well-Being would prescribe.

• Great ideas; too bad we need ‘em

Still, a high-profile story like this reminds us to step back and think about our little BreakAway.  Great tips like “Relish the anticipation” remind us that foreplay and faith offer part of the fun.  “Make your time count” means stop sight-seeing; start relaxing.

And of course, “Ditch the smartphone” asserts that less screen time is so much more calming—and that the term “weisure” has landed in our vocabulary to describe the regrettable trend of working while resting.  Yuck!

• Hardest working, least happy

Surveys, books, and one’s own travels continue to confirm that Americans are among the hardest-working people on earth, yet are also among the unhappiest.  That’s a complex disorder to fix, but there are ways each of us can fight that funk.

Like, take your vacation already, before another sweet summer fades away!

It’s my opinion that nobody ever regrets opening their minds to the gift of free time.

If you long for a career break—or break of any kind—what is that tipping point that makes you finally GO?  And what about where?  My friends at Meet, Plan, Go! have been asking all hosts to answer that question; my story runs today.

• Deciding where to go

In my family’s case, we felt like we were nearly there.  After all, we’d done the hard work—made the decision, set the budget, and begun navigating most of the 555 obstacles.  But there was one problem:  We didn’t know where to go.  For months, we debated.  A good problem to have, yes!  Fun?  Not so much.

• Yet another strange twist…

The strange source of inspiration that finally ended the conundrum turned out to be a long-lost, faded, travel article in a forgotten file—that I literally stumbled on while purging piles in my office. That’s strange; I still think so.

But in yet another strange twist of alignment, the person who co-runs MPG and posted my story, Michaela Potter, was responsible for stuffing the envelope…while an intern at a PR firm…that was hired to promote Grenada tourism…which reached the journalist…who took the bait, booked the trip, and wrote the story.

Grenada was pushing hard to revive its tourism after the infamous invasion during the Reagan administration.

That was in 1996—about 13 years before I found the article and ended up in Grenada.  Today, Michaela and I made that bizarre, but remarkable, connection.  I’m still gripping my forehead.

• Ripples across the water

In a way, these stories of travel and BreakAways continue long after the plane brings you home again.  There are memories, yes, but also connections yet to be made.

Michaela and I made another today.  My thanks to her, Sherry Ott, and the all good people advocating career breaks because we BELIEVE!

Sabbaticals and career breaks continue to make big news (if you look in the right places).  Moreover, the definitions keep expanding—for better or worse—to include everything from two-days of tax-free shopping to checking into treatment for the umpteenth time.  Serious students of Sabbatical Theory should consider:

• The “Snap Year.” Brits have forever provided the world’s best role modeling for taking a “gap year.”  Youth strap on the backpack—and BreakAway—to see the world, celebrate graduation, and delay career commencement.  The number of volunteer heroes has plummeted, though, as has the time period set aside to wander.  Snap year?  My bum!  This most dreadful news.

• The Annual Tax Sabbatical. This break lasts only two days—an absurdly short sabbatical by any measure.  Still, whenever you give people a haitus from taxes, they get giddier than Tea Party fanatics at a Michelle Bachman rally.  So whatever you call it, a welcome sabbatical it is!

• The Addiction Career Break. Melanie Griffith is pushing spin-dry.  Again.  We wish the best for Melanie, of course.  But really now, how come all that a celeb has to do to get a “career break” is relapse into addiction?  The rest of us would be shipped off to “rehab.”  No, no, no!

• The Un-digital Sabbatical. Once again, someone smart has been studying this site and taken our advice not only to BreakAway, but to do so sans digitalia.  In this case, our follower shall also pursue much unplugged meditation.  While impressive, it does beg the question:  Why do so many people who do this feel the need to tell all about it on the internets?

• The Pirate Break. After a summer of untellable pillaging, high-end parenting, and stormy weather, this BreakAway advocate has snuck away to Okoboji—a neverneverland where pirates rule the day and few other rules apply.  We all need a few places that provide such good booty and revelry.  Happy sails!

In the pursuit of repose and pleasure, one can find inspiration in the strangest of places.  For me, being in the middle of a body of water virtually guarantees some soothing soul space.  But be careful where you float:  There are some queer birds out there!

Like these two lovebirds—flying solo together.  Oh sure, their craft was mobile, even though the wings had been clipped.  But when I asked where they were headed, they simply smiled and said, “Nowhere.”

And that’s exactly where they went.  For at least a few hours, their odd craft just rode the breeze in the middle of the lake, as if to ask us gung-ho kayakers and frenetic skiers

What’s the big hurry?  Aren’t you just going in circles?”

The loons weren’t happy about the monstrous beast.  But then, they get all agitated about stand-up paddleboards too (this year’s new floating fad).  A few grizzled fishermen also rolled their eyeballs.

As for me, they made my day.  So I took a pic, got out of their way, and followed their example by slowing down and floating for a while.

Some of us preach the Gospel of Sabbatical and insist your career will be fine—no, better!—with breaks.  I try to apply that lifestyle to my daily grind, which leads to a stubborn regimen of outdoor time, exercise, chillaxing, and unplugging.  Of all of these, unplugging has become the most impossible.  Help!

You can hide, but you can’t run away”

It’s summer.  Dive into it before the long days fade into fall, right? Do more bar-b-que and less Chili’s. Eat more fresh fruits and fewer roots.  Watch a parade, ball game, and fireworks instead of your various SCREENS.

But prepare to pay the price, which, for me, in a matter of a few days, included:

• 755 unread emails
• 2,400 messages in my in-box (which I sweep out regularly)
• Lost messages, a check, and a bill (yay!)
• A disappointed friend whose text invitation I did not notice
• A money mess

And yet, one feels so…attached”

The conundrum thickens.  The more you step away from your (digital) desk, the larger the (proverbial) piles will be when you return.  So it’s little wonder that people seem plugged in 24/7.  Just in the past few days, I’ve witnessed now-common things like…

• A senior citizen swerving while driving…because she was on her cel phone
• Members of my household doing three digital devices…while watching TV
• A gaggle of teen girls at a baseball game…all staring at their “smart” phones
• A young man texting while driving…while eating a Big Mac
• A jam-packed coffee shop…with everybody screen-ing, and nobody talking

I would prefer not to…”

When Herman Mellville’s novella, “Bartleby the Scrivener,” made famous that quote, he presaged how many of us feel about insistent digital demands.  But note that Bartleby’s “preference” is not an outright refusal.

And should you refuse, prepare to pay the price.

And for no one to listen.