You can’t make this stuff up. This really just happened to me.

Along with millions of others in our great nation, I’m having a little issue with the IRS. Without getting technical, the story goes something like this…

The IRS owes me money. The IRS not only won’t pay it, but…

• The IRS decided I owe THEM money instead.
• They DOUBLED the amount without reason when I begged to differ.
• They REFUSE to offer calculations or reasons.
• And yes, my accountant and I are simply playing by THEIR RULES.
• (BTW, Minnesota accepted our claim and paid the refund immediately!!!)

This sick dance has been going on for months, and they keep failing to respond by the dates they say they will. So yesterday, I did the unthinkable: I called the IRS.

Note to self: Never again.

I waited. And waited. After a half-hour or so, I got a live person! She read me the standard greeting script (name, rank, location, this may be recorded, etc.). I talked back, ready to dig in.

But guess what? She couldn’t hear me. Just kept saying,

“Hello, hello? Is anybody there? I’m sorry, I can’t hear you. Please call back Monday through Friday at the hours of…”

I’m literally SCREAMING into my phone, which has NEVER malfunctioned and worked fine before and after. She hung up. I fell to the floor. It was too late in the day to try again; they close up early.

Yes, I fell to the floor. Uh-huh, I kicked and screamed and wailed like an baby in a tantrum—this, despite my ever-evolving Work in yoga, meditation, and other stuff to help me remain calm. Accepting. Open. Nonjudgmental and all that crap.

Fuggetaboutit! Mindfulness does not apply to dealing with the IRS.

Hey, I’m only playing by THEIR RULES. Following their instructions, their code. But they somehow turn my refund into a substantial bill. Won’t give their reasons or figurings why. And then can’t hear me when I finally get them on the phone.

See? So may of the rules we live by are just plain bogus. Absurd. There’s nobody home, not even at the IRS—the Taxman for the US, the largest financial entity in the world. We try to play by these “rules” and still, those in charge, can’t even hear us.

You can’t make this stuff up. So although it’s clear that you can run but you cannot hide (or be heard), I see yet another reason to run away: The IRS.

God Bless America. We need all the help we can get.

A dear friend whom I’ve known since I was 5 sent me this. RULES from a club we had as 4th graders. We met twice a week (or more) under a stairway in his house. There were old Playboys (he had 4 older brothers) there! We learned to BreakAway from those brothers, our parents, and all the RULES of the world…only to make our own.

CLUB RULES

No cussing.

No teasing.

No yelling.

Don’t damage other people’s property.

No bribery.

No stealing.

No ripping magizane.

No prank call to nobody you know.

No squealing.

No hiding.

No locking people in the club.

Don’t tell anybody our secrets.

No leaving the light on.

No writing notes about club members.

WOW! Can’t believe we came up with all that, in pencil-perfect, as 9-year-olds. What might we be learning about rules through this exercise in nostalgia?

Rules are smart.

Rules change. (Some no longer apply, like that one about cussing.)

Non-puter text was primitive, though poignant.

Do unto others…

Times were tough! (Tough times don’t last; tough people do!)

Life was sweet and pure…in the day…

Is there a bigger lesson here? But of course! The four young men who wrote those rules and met often for soft porn, bowling, pool, and ping-pong were simply escaping their dads, moms, sibs, and more…to hang out together in some parallel universe where there was not cussing, teasing, yelling, or squealing!

To be sure, there was probably plenty of cussing, teasing, yelling, squealing, and more. But in The Club, you could claim Higher Ground and stop such nonsense by merely invoking….The Rules.

So what are your Rules?

What are mine? Who wrote them? Do they still work? Or did we write them in the 4th grade? Or did we just inherit them from our upbringing? Are they as dated as the Mayberry RFD? Polaroid? Milli Vanilli? WebVan? Why are we still sticking by them?

“Hack” is a word, they say, that suggests living by your own rules, carving your own path through this planet. My advisors say it’s a good word to use in your blogs and things.

Hack! Hack! Hack! (Excuse me. Got a Kleenex?)

Yes, rules are everywhere. Omnipresent. As a community, we are better for it. Beyond that—and there IS life beyond rules—hack away. Remember the Goldens, do no harm, and hack your own bliss.

These stats are ill enough to make you sick.   

• 33 Estimated percentage of Americans who report their family has had problems paying medical bills in the past year.
• 47 Percentage of the public who report that someone in their family is skipping pills, postponing or cutting back on medical care they needed in the past year because of the cost of care.

What is wrong with this picture? Just about everything.

How can people stay healthy if they can’t afford the costs? Won’t they only get worse and it’ll cost our society (and themselves) more? What good is a BreakAway or even an evening out if you don’t feel good?

Don’t take your health for granted. If you’re planning a vacation of any kind, know you’ll enjoy it much more if you don’t go into it sick and tired.

A BreakAway, at its best, is a time to rejuvenate. Not to recover.

Fight to feel good. Apparently, that’s not always easy.

Keep your eyes on the prize.

But expect your vision to get foggy—with emotion. Maybe not crocodile tears, but certainly the lonely little tears of confusion, fear, and sheer Kierkegaardian angst.

In this BreakAway Kommittee’s case, the issues hitting the fan include: Transportation (Oy vey is mir, are we going to lose 6 or more days to flying, ferrying, taxi-ing, and schlepping in completely unpredictable vehicles?); What to bring (cameras, computers, toys, snorkel gear, and a guitar butt up against the ever-present uber-mantra “Travel light!”); where to stay (some prefer long, leisurely stays to hunker down and find a groove, while others want to see it all by moving around a lot).

We are deer in the headlights. Can’t see the bright lights hurling toward us through the weeps of emotion, though.

Pull off the road. Check your vision, map, and dipstick. Above all, remember the most relevant of The 5 5-word mantras: Everything is right on schedule.

ODDS OF GOING TODAY: 72.55%
BIGGEST OBSTACLE TODAY: Transportation
OPINION OF ISLAND TRANSPO BASED ON PAST TRIPS: Aaaaarrrgghh…

OMG.  FYI.  

• 53 Percentage of working Americans who have been interrupted by a work-related phone call or e-mail while in the bathroom.
• 23 Percentage who have been interrupted while on a date.
• 59 Percentage of working Americans who never turn off their mobile device.
• SOURCE: Nokia

Is this news? Or, as David Letterman would ask, “Is this something?”

No. Because most of us have already been there and done that, or at least seen that.

Yes, because it stinks. Not for Nokia, of course. They are laughing all the way to the bank (and the bathroom). But jeez, is it any wonder people complain about stress? That they grumble about lack of “free time?” I mean, if you offer up yourself to digital interruption when tending to nature’s calls, when won’t you?

If you can’t give unfettered attention to your date, what are the prospects for a long-term understanding, spreading the sheets together, or even a good-night kiss?

“Oh, ‘scuze me, Biff, I’m turned on but, like, so is my phone, and it’s all atwitter right now…”

“I’ll give you a little smooch right after I take this phone call…”

As for the 59% who NEVER turn it off, good luck. The few folks who believe in silence and choice wish you well. Please know, though, that most studies have debunked the notion of “multitasking” as poppycock. Human brains just ain’t wired for it. At this rate, maybe we WILL be in a few thousand years. But by then, cell phones will be so, like, yesterday.

Thanks for listening. Now if you’ll excuse me, please, I have to go the bathroom. OOPS! Almost forgot my i-phone…

“Our culture is suffering from an overdose of action and a shortage of contemplation. I consider contemplation a basic need; you even see it in animals. Just think about dogs and cats. You often see them staring off into space. I think that’s their way of meditating, their way of recharging their batteries. We need to have that too. But we deny this basic, psychological need—as if an entire society were to forget to go to the bathroom. That’s serious!”

Piero Ferrucci, Italian psychiatrist, in ODE Magazine, “The Silence Issue,” July/August 2008

I have a lot to say about this idea. But for now, perhaps it’s best if I stay quiet.

Check it out! This guru and travel agent for the BreakAway-bound is offering discounts to those who lost their jobs! He’s talking with HR departments to help tend to the soon-jobless.

He’s preaching the virtues of “newfound freedom” when unemployment strikes. He’s swimming against current panic and making money doing it.

Gotta love this guy—AND the amazing trips he offers!

Debt news is everywhere.  Are not we all forever indebted?

• 10 Percentage of Americans who are taking out more cash advances on their credit cards than in the past.
• 20 Percentage of respondents who indicate they are “sometimes” or “always” unable to pay their credit card and/or loan balances each month.
• 8 Percentage who say they can make only the minimum payment required.
• Source: Standard and Poor’s ExecuComp

The good news: These numbers, floating in air, don’t mean much without something to compare them to.

The bad news: Only a dummy would see any bright side to those numbers, with or without something to compare them to.

Folks, we are finally getting spanked for our squandering ways. Sure, it’s just numbers on paper. And so is money itself—and that was before computers made money a “virtual” concept and paper an ungreen commodity. But some big, fat RESET button in the fiscal sky is getting hit violently.

Ever see a thug play pinball? It’s not pretty. It usually breaks the machine, and then the rest of us can’t play our game with touch and intuition any more. Not until it gets fixed, which, of course, most pinball games don’t.

Who’s gonna pay for this stuff?

• The bailout(s)?
• The Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac bailout programs announced today (which failed to make stocks rally)?
• The car company bailouts?
• Overall government debt?
• Stimulus policies?
• A new New Deal?
• Evermore credit card debt—as illustrated above?

In the old days, you could find economists who would say things like, “Government debt doesn’t matter, because it’s only money a people owes to itself.” That argument doesn’t work not, though. The world is one big, broken piggy bank. And the U.S. owes gazillions to other countries. Do we expect them to give, forgive and forget?

No. So who’s gonna pay? You know who: Anybody with any cash. Anyone with taxable income. Anybody with a decent job and investing habits.

Bummer—if you should be so blessed, but that’s what you get for being “in the black.”
Nothing new about that, of course, but the stakes keep getting higher. Expect higher taxes, pathetic interest rates, little appreciation on your house and other hard assets, a stock market that will take years to get back to its recent highs, and possibly inflation. Stagflation. Deflation. Systemic, worldwide flatulence with not enough Gas-X to go around.

What’s this got to do with Sabbaticals? Plenty. If you’re waiting to get rich, or pay off all your debt, or have time to burn, it may never happen. Only you know. Or not.

Get out of town, while you still can. For now, you may have to overlook the debt. The banks. The government. The global meltdown that may or may not produce a kinder, gentler, stronger planet. You may have to stop hugging your dayjob, even though these days they are things worth holding onto.

Worry about YOU. Find a way to make time, take time, and let go of the numbers on paper that are crippling too many lives. Even if you’re about to file bankruptcy and lose your house, there may be a way. Life goes on. All you have is today, this moment, this breath.

As for the crisis? As usual, the experts and politicians are united in this one opinion: This too shall pass.

Have a sunny day.

This L. A. Times article is a must-read for anyone who:

• Thinks there is no upside to the downturn in shopping;
• believes they got it bad though they’ve not yet succumbed to thrift-store shopping;
• believes that it’s patriotic and good for the world to spend, spend, spend;
• would like to compare their debt load: “The typical American carries credit-card debt of more than $8,000…”

Author Judith Freeman nails it with this thoughtful missive…

It’s time to pull back. The beast of burden simply can’t carry any more. Few Americans have much in the way of savings. Many of us have lived beyond our means. The typical American carries credit card debt of more than $8,000, and credit is tightening. The party is over, and for many Americans it wasn’t even that much fun.

Yep, it’s time to pull back. And yet, many Goodwills and stuff donation centers are packed to the gills—turning down (or throwing away) donations. Waste management is a booming business. Storage services and pods keep expanding. And most Americans’ closets, pantries, AND panties are bursting.

Wanna BreakAway? Get out of debt. Spend less. (Ever try thrift and consignment stores? They can be entertaining, impressive, and inexpensive.) Try out the 11 Commandments of Fiscal Fitness. And remember: Even when money is in short supply, we are all equally rich with time.

TIME IS THE NEW MONEY.

Spend both sensibly! (Or both will be gone before you know what hit ya…)

Now here’s a fascinating article. In short, a recent survey found that young people (15-25) say they are more spiritual than ever:

“93 percent of the young people surveyed believe there is a spiritual aspect to life.”

“Spending time in nature” topped the list of responses. “Listening to or playing music” was No. 2, and “helping other people or the community” was third.

“Attending religious services” was ninth on the list of the top 12 most-frequent answers.

Many young people are turning to meditation — so many, in fact, that the Mindfulness Meditation Club at the University of Minnesota soon might be forced to find a bigger space for its weekly introductory yoga classes.”

Why is this makeyourbreakaway site curious? Because a Sabbatical is, at its core, a spiritual Mission. A time of probing and opening and releasing and—most of all—FAITH.

If you don’t have the faith that you can BreakAway someday—and that something profound awaits on your journey—then your odds of getting a Sabbatical plummet.

But if you ride your Faith, it just may lead you to free time, fun, and fantastic experiences (which, for most people, includes desire for time in nature) that you crave. And you can bet your i-Touch you’ll be touched in ways that are (call it what you want) deep and spiritual.

Take your time. And keep the faith.