Oh jeez.  Looks like Santa’s going to be a bit of a Grinch this X-mas, among other signs of the times…

• 88% will spend the same or less on gifts
• 83% will buy more items on sale
• 75% feel pressure from debts
• 62% will wait for a sale
• 61% will focus on practical gifts
• 58% will cut back because of credit concerns
• 49% will cut travel plans
• Source: America’s Research Group/UBS, Maritz, Deloitte, Accenture, Consumer Reports, Thrivent

This stuff, or most of it, just don’t break my heart very much. I mean, who doesn’t complain about the over-commercialism of the holidays? What’s wrong with buying stuff on sale? What’s not to love about buying practical gifts instead of impractical ones?

Elsewhere in the newspapers, though, lurks news that strikes sadder notes. The downturn is causing closings of the little cafés that make Paris so distinctive—taking countless jobs and proud professions. Once there were 200,000; now there are 41,500. A way of life goes down the drain, rather like America’s farm crisis murdered small-town culture.

Meanwhile, in Boston, just outside the ivory-pearly gates of Harvard, a decades-old newsstand and gathering place is calling it quits. No longer can you get newspapers from all over the world, pick up the latest MAD magazine, or possibly meet a new friend.

Then again, who needs all that when you got texting on your Blackberry?

In record time, the Accommodations Kommittee has reached consensus. All nights are booked; all travel legs are known.

Now we shall learn time and time again that “life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” But absent that, we’ll have…

St. John 19 days
St. Vincent 3 days
Bequia 17 days
Grenada 27 days
San Juan 3 days

TOTAL 69 days

Has it been fun planning this?  Not really.  (Okay:  Occasionally.)  Still, I’m thankful we’ve come this far.  Yet we have so-o-o-o-o far to go…

Here’s a book recommendation—for anyone who can handle relatively scholarly tomes.

It’s “The Great Inflation and Its Aftermath: The Past and Future of American Affluence,” by Robert J. Samuelson. He’s out promoting it now, so you may hear him on a radio, TV, or podcast near you.

Although the book is mostly about a past period (’62 – ’82), Samuelson has plenty to say about today’s conditions. Mostly not good. The stock market and housing booms that made us “rich” for so long are over. So over. Prepare thyself for…

Affluence deprivation. That’s one of his million-dollar idioms, although with the downturn in the economy such as it is, perhaps it’s now worth only half that.

Affluence deprivation is what we are about to encounter—when people gradually “have” less, and it hurts. His point is: We still probably have enough, and perhaps more than most of the world and than most points in American history.

But…we’ll feel deprived. We’ll talk poor. (“Poor talk” is another old cliché’; it’s when people talked poor for decades long after the Depression was over and times were relatively great.)

We’ll soon talk about “back in the day,” when we drove SUVs to expensive eateries and drank pink martinis while wearing Sex-in-the-City designer duds. We’ll lament that we no longer fly to Vegas for suites, shows, Gray Goose, and craps.

Don’t let this era be a dud. Speak not of depraved deprivation. We’ll be fine. In many ways, we’re no less rich with time than we were when our portfolios were fat, dumb, and happy. Keep hacking away at your dreams and Big Ideas. And BreakAway from the poor-tawkin’ crowd…

You can’t make this stuff up. This really just happened to me.

Along with millions of others in our great nation, I’m having a little issue with the IRS. Without getting technical, the story goes something like this…

The IRS owes me money. The IRS not only won’t pay it, but…

• The IRS decided I owe THEM money instead.
• They DOUBLED the amount without reason when I begged to differ.
• They REFUSE to offer calculations or reasons.
• And yes, my accountant and I are simply playing by THEIR RULES.
• (BTW, Minnesota accepted our claim and paid the refund immediately!!!)

This sick dance has been going on for months, and they keep failing to respond by the dates they say they will. So yesterday, I did the unthinkable: I called the IRS.

Note to self: Never again.

I waited. And waited. After a half-hour or so, I got a live person! She read me the standard greeting script (name, rank, location, this may be recorded, etc.). I talked back, ready to dig in.

But guess what? She couldn’t hear me. Just kept saying,

“Hello, hello? Is anybody there? I’m sorry, I can’t hear you. Please call back Monday through Friday at the hours of…”

I’m literally SCREAMING into my phone, which has NEVER malfunctioned and worked fine before and after. She hung up. I fell to the floor. It was too late in the day to try again; they close up early.

Yes, I fell to the floor. Uh-huh, I kicked and screamed and wailed like an baby in a tantrum—this, despite my ever-evolving Work in yoga, meditation, and other stuff to help me remain calm. Accepting. Open. Nonjudgmental and all that crap.

Fuggetaboutit! Mindfulness does not apply to dealing with the IRS.

Hey, I’m only playing by THEIR RULES. Following their instructions, their code. But they somehow turn my refund into a substantial bill. Won’t give their reasons or figurings why. And then can’t hear me when I finally get them on the phone.

See? So may of the rules we live by are just plain bogus. Absurd. There’s nobody home, not even at the IRS—the Taxman for the US, the largest financial entity in the world. We try to play by these “rules” and still, those in charge, can’t even hear us.

You can’t make this stuff up. So although it’s clear that you can run but you cannot hide (or be heard), I see yet another reason to run away: The IRS.

God Bless America. We need all the help we can get.

A dear friend whom I’ve known since I was 5 sent me this. RULES from a club we had as 4th graders. We met twice a week (or more) under a stairway in his house. There were old Playboys (he had 4 older brothers) there! We learned to BreakAway from those brothers, our parents, and all the RULES of the world…only to make our own.

CLUB RULES

No cussing.

No teasing.

No yelling.

Don’t damage other people’s property.

No bribery.

No stealing.

No ripping magizane.

No prank call to nobody you know.

No squealing.

No hiding.

No locking people in the club.

Don’t tell anybody our secrets.

No leaving the light on.

No writing notes about club members.

WOW! Can’t believe we came up with all that, in pencil-perfect, as 9-year-olds. What might we be learning about rules through this exercise in nostalgia?

Rules are smart.

Rules change. (Some no longer apply, like that one about cussing.)

Non-puter text was primitive, though poignant.

Do unto others…

Times were tough! (Tough times don’t last; tough people do!)

Life was sweet and pure…in the day…

Is there a bigger lesson here? But of course! The four young men who wrote those rules and met often for soft porn, bowling, pool, and ping-pong were simply escaping their dads, moms, sibs, and more…to hang out together in some parallel universe where there was not cussing, teasing, yelling, or squealing!

To be sure, there was probably plenty of cussing, teasing, yelling, squealing, and more. But in The Club, you could claim Higher Ground and stop such nonsense by merely invoking….The Rules.

So what are your Rules?

What are mine? Who wrote them? Do they still work? Or did we write them in the 4th grade? Or did we just inherit them from our upbringing? Are they as dated as the Mayberry RFD? Polaroid? Milli Vanilli? WebVan? Why are we still sticking by them?

“Hack” is a word, they say, that suggests living by your own rules, carving your own path through this planet. My advisors say it’s a good word to use in your blogs and things.

Hack! Hack! Hack! (Excuse me. Got a Kleenex?)

Yes, rules are everywhere. Omnipresent. As a community, we are better for it. Beyond that—and there IS life beyond rules—hack away. Remember the Goldens, do no harm, and hack your own bliss.

These stats are ill enough to make you sick.   

• 33 Estimated percentage of Americans who report their family has had problems paying medical bills in the past year.
• 47 Percentage of the public who report that someone in their family is skipping pills, postponing or cutting back on medical care they needed in the past year because of the cost of care.

What is wrong with this picture? Just about everything.

How can people stay healthy if they can’t afford the costs? Won’t they only get worse and it’ll cost our society (and themselves) more? What good is a BreakAway or even an evening out if you don’t feel good?

Don’t take your health for granted. If you’re planning a vacation of any kind, know you’ll enjoy it much more if you don’t go into it sick and tired.

A BreakAway, at its best, is a time to rejuvenate. Not to recover.

Fight to feel good. Apparently, that’s not always easy.

Keep your eyes on the prize.

But expect your vision to get foggy—with emotion. Maybe not crocodile tears, but certainly the lonely little tears of confusion, fear, and sheer Kierkegaardian angst.

In this BreakAway Kommittee’s case, the issues hitting the fan include: Transportation (Oy vey is mir, are we going to lose 6 or more days to flying, ferrying, taxi-ing, and schlepping in completely unpredictable vehicles?); What to bring (cameras, computers, toys, snorkel gear, and a guitar butt up against the ever-present uber-mantra “Travel light!”); where to stay (some prefer long, leisurely stays to hunker down and find a groove, while others want to see it all by moving around a lot).

We are deer in the headlights. Can’t see the bright lights hurling toward us through the weeps of emotion, though.

Pull off the road. Check your vision, map, and dipstick. Above all, remember the most relevant of The 5 5-word mantras: Everything is right on schedule.

ODDS OF GOING TODAY: 72.55%
BIGGEST OBSTACLE TODAY: Transportation
OPINION OF ISLAND TRANSPO BASED ON PAST TRIPS: Aaaaarrrgghh…

OMG.  FYI.  

• 53 Percentage of working Americans who have been interrupted by a work-related phone call or e-mail while in the bathroom.
• 23 Percentage who have been interrupted while on a date.
• 59 Percentage of working Americans who never turn off their mobile device.
• SOURCE: Nokia

Is this news? Or, as David Letterman would ask, “Is this something?”

No. Because most of us have already been there and done that, or at least seen that.

Yes, because it stinks. Not for Nokia, of course. They are laughing all the way to the bank (and the bathroom). But jeez, is it any wonder people complain about stress? That they grumble about lack of “free time?” I mean, if you offer up yourself to digital interruption when tending to nature’s calls, when won’t you?

If you can’t give unfettered attention to your date, what are the prospects for a long-term understanding, spreading the sheets together, or even a good-night kiss?

“Oh, ‘scuze me, Biff, I’m turned on but, like, so is my phone, and it’s all atwitter right now…”

“I’ll give you a little smooch right after I take this phone call…”

As for the 59% who NEVER turn it off, good luck. The few folks who believe in silence and choice wish you well. Please know, though, that most studies have debunked the notion of “multitasking” as poppycock. Human brains just ain’t wired for it. At this rate, maybe we WILL be in a few thousand years. But by then, cell phones will be so, like, yesterday.

Thanks for listening. Now if you’ll excuse me, please, I have to go the bathroom. OOPS! Almost forgot my i-phone…

“Our culture is suffering from an overdose of action and a shortage of contemplation. I consider contemplation a basic need; you even see it in animals. Just think about dogs and cats. You often see them staring off into space. I think that’s their way of meditating, their way of recharging their batteries. We need to have that too. But we deny this basic, psychological need—as if an entire society were to forget to go to the bathroom. That’s serious!”

Piero Ferrucci, Italian psychiatrist, in ODE Magazine, “The Silence Issue,” July/August 2008

I have a lot to say about this idea. But for now, perhaps it’s best if I stay quiet.

Check it out! This guru and travel agent for the BreakAway-bound is offering discounts to those who lost their jobs! He’s talking with HR departments to help tend to the soon-jobless.

He’s preaching the virtues of “newfound freedom” when unemployment strikes. He’s swimming against current panic and making money doing it.

Gotta love this guy—AND the amazing trips he offers!